How to know when to quit your job
The biggest question I have struggled with as a user researcher is: “when is it time to quit my job?” It’s inevitable that it comes up - sometimes as a fleeting thought when I am having a bad week and sometimes as a thought that gets stuck on repeat in my brain.
I would ruminate:
Is it time to leave?
When should I go?
Should I start interviewing somewhere else?
Do I really want to go through the process of starting allllll over again?
I’ve encountered some horrifying situations in which I promptly packed my desk up and left. But it’s the more subtle stories and feelings that make this decision harder. Something will happen and I will be mad or frustrated - again, someone ignored my insights, or I spent hours on a research project that just changed mid-way through. Irritated, I throw my hands up and grumble about wanting to find a new job. Then the doubt seeps in:
Is it really that bad? Should I really leave over this? Shouldn’t I be able to do a better job and fix this?
I’m not alone in struggling with this. This combination of frustration and doubt can ping pong in your mind for a long time, making the whole situation worse. I’ve had many people approach me, asking if this is the way things should be:
Should people be ignoring me? Should I have to beg for them to listen to me?
Should colleagues be telling me how to do my job?
Should I just “go with it” when people don’t take my advice and continue with their coveted ideas despite research?
Should I get pushback or get questioned on everything I present?
The thing is, no, you really shouldn’t, at least not for a prolonged amount of time. If you are joining a company with a low user research maturity or are new to user research, you might have to go through these battles for a while. But, after 3-6 months, they should start to fade into the background. That’s my benchmark - and still is!
Let’s say you are at the five-month mark and nothing is changing, or maybe you are only one month in and miserable (I’ve quit within a month!), or maybe you’ve been there for years and struggled with these challenges non-stop. Regardless of where you are right now if you are thinking about whether or not you should move on, let me tell you my secret. These are the series of questions I ask myself every time this thought pops into my head and they have never steered me wrong:
“Am I currently learning/growing/developing at this company?”
“Will I be able to learn/grow/develop in the next 3-6 months?”
“What helpful and relevant skills am I or could I continue to learn if I stayed?”
“Are these skills something that could help me in future positions?”
Now let’s break this down:
“Am I currently learning/growing/developing at this company?”
This is the first and most important question. Are you learning, growing, and developing at this current company? If the answer is no, then that is your first red flag. You don’t want to stay at a place where the environment doesn’t enable you to learn. Trust me, I have done this and wasted months of my career spinning my wheels. That time could have been better spent trying to find a new job that would help me get to the next level in my career.
However, since we don’t want to rush into such a big decision, we go on to the next question.
“Will I be able to learn/grow/develop in the next 3-6 months?”
If you aren’t learning now, will something magically happen that will grant you the ability to learn in the next 3-6 months? For instance, can you move to a new manager? Or can you get learning budget that you can use for outside mentorship? If you can’t answer this for sure, then think of the answer as a “no.” Which is your second red flag. Because, then, you are saying you likely won’t learn anything in the next 3-6 months.
But, alas, we want to make sure this is the right decision, so on to the next question.
“What helpful and relevant skills am I or could I continue to learn if I stayed?”
This is the last one if you have gone through a series of “no’s.” Or even “yes’s.”
If you answered yes to questions 1 & 2, ask yourself what type of skills are you (or could you) learn if you stayed? Because, learning how to beg better, or learning how to overcome an asshole colleague can be helpful BUT there are better things for you to learn, like how to improve your interviewing skills or how to become a research manager. Really think about if these skills are useful or not to you. Yes, there will always be jerks and difficult colleagues you will work with, but it isn’t your job to fix these people or win them over. Your job is to be a kick-ass user researcher. Make sure the skills you would stay for are actually relevant to helping you in your career.
Helpful skills would include:
Improving technical research skills, such as writing research plans, interviewing, creating reports, recruiting tough audiences
Improving soft skills such as workshop facilitation, stakeholder management (but not begging), and storytelling
Organizational skills such as managing others, getting involved in large-scale strategic research
Unhelpful skills include:
Begging people to listen to you over and over
Dealing with people who don’t care about research (after you have tried to educate them for 3-6 months)
Convincing people you are an expert and know how to do your job
If you answered no to questions 1 & 2, it is likely time for you to leave. And that is okay, in fact, it is great. You can be free of that and find a supportive environment for you to grow!
It’s about thriving, not surviving.
But what if you answered yes and are still unsure?
If you are growing and learning, and you believe you will do so in the next 3-6 months, relevant and helpful skills for your future. I would consider staying. Staying doesn’t mean you don’t interview to see if there is a better fit for you. Look at other companies, network, and interview. It’s always good to practice and see what is out there.
And, if you just want a change, I am giving you permission right now! I have left jobs where I am still learning for opportunities where I would learn more. For instance, I was a senior individual contributor and still learning at one of my jobs, but I left it because I found another role that would offer me the chance at being a research manager. It was a new skill I wouldn’t have the chance to explore in my current role. So, if you want to try new things or learn new skills, or even explore new industries - go for it!
A huge caveat
This article, of course, doesn’t cover things like harassment, toxic work environments, discrimination - if any of those things are happening, even if you answered yes, consider leaving. Unfortunately, work takes up a large part of our life, and life is short. You will and can find something better - you deserve it.
If you answered no, don’t be sad. This is a great learning opportunity! Go forth and interview! Find yourself something better!
